Editing Marriage (Guide)

{{GuideFor|Category=Category: Organising a Wedding|Pages = Attend to Matters of the Heart!}}
'' 'On the occasion of your marriage the Empress offers her sincere congratulations, and the following advice: Be sensible. Except when sense would admit defeat. Be kind. Except when kindness would come between you. Be faithful. Always. May your marriage bring you the happiness mine brought me. Eternally, Victoria R.' ''

- [[A Letter from the Empress]]

==Marrying Another Player==
===Getting Started===
To marry another player, you must first be {{IL|Acquainted With}} them. Then you may [[Admit your affection for an acquaintance|admit your affection for them]] (at a cost of a {{IL|Free Evening}}, {{IL|Romantic Notion|10 x}} and {{IL|Touching Love Story|1 x}}) in [[Attend to Matters of the Heart!]]; if they accept your affections, you will be {{IL|Seen with}} each other.

Next, you can propose to them, either [[Make a simple proposal of marriage|simply]] (at a cost of {{IL|Piece of Rostygold|100 x}}, {{IL|Moon-Pearl|1 x}}, {{IL|Romantic Notion|10 x}} and a {{IL|Free Evening}}) or [[Make a grand proposal of marriage|grandly]] (at a cost of {{IL|Romantic Notion|100 x}}, {{IL|Magnificent Diamond|1 x}}, {{IL|Personal Recommendation|1 x}}, {{IL|Night on the Town|1 x}} and a {{IL|Free Evening}}). Simple proposals can only be made to non-{{IL|A Person of Some Importance - |Appearance = PoSIs}}. If they accept, you'll be {{IL|Engaged to}} each other, and you will gain {{IL|Organising a Wedding|x 1}}.

===Organisation===
Your first task is to secure the relevant paperwork, either [[Acquire the proper paperwork through dubious means|through dubious means]] costing {{IL|Stolen Correspondence|x 10}} and giving {{IL|Organising a Wedding|x 5}}, or [[Obtain a wedding licence from the Bazaar|from the Bazaar]] costing a {{IL|Bazaar Permit}} and giving {{IL|Organising a Wedding|x 13}} - or, if you're looking to squeeze as much {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance = OaW}} out of this stage as possible, you can do both in that order.

To increase {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance = OaW}} further, the following options become available in [[Plan a Wedding]] as your levels of {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance = OaW}} increase - with the notable exceptions of [[Procure a handful of more costly bottles]] and [[Seek advice from those who have gone through this before]], they don't become unavailable again once unlocked.

{| class="article-table sortable" style="width: 100%;" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="1" border="0"
|-
! Levels
! Action
! Costs
! Echo Value
! Gains
|-
|5-100
|[[Seek advice from those who have gone through this before]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |10 x {{IL|Tale of Terror!!|Appearance=}}
| 5
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |5 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|5+
|[[Identify reliable witnesses]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |2 x {{IL|Sworn Statement|Appearance=}}
|5
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |5 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|5+
|[[Plan the guest list]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |20 x {{IL|Scrap of Incendiary Gossip|Appearance=}}
|10
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |10 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|10+
|[[Locate a reliable vicar]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |{{TableList|1 x {{IL|Favours: The Church|Appearance=}}|2 x {{IL|Touching Love Story|Appearance=}}}}
|17<ref name = favour>Valuing the favour at 12E (due to Tribute Night-Whispers)</ref>
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |20 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|10+
|[[See if the Bishop of Southwark will officiate]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |{{TableList|3 x {{IL|Favours: The Church|Appearance=}}|1 x {{IL|Personal Recommendation|Appearance=}}}}
|42<ref name = favour>Valuing the favour at 12E (due to Tribute Night-Whispers)</ref><ref name=hard>Harder to acquire than the value suggests</ref>
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |75 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|20+
|[[Source food from local street-vendors]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |500 x {{IL|Rat on a String|Appearance=}}
|5
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |10 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|20+
|[[Poach an Improbably Accomplished Chef from a well-to-do house]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |{{TableList|1 x {{IL|Favours: Society|Appearance =}}|2 x {{IL|Muscaria Brandy|Appearance=}}}}
|17<ref name = favour>Valuing the favour at 12E (due to Tribute Night-Whispers)</ref>
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |10 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|30+
|[[Procure vast quantities of cheap plonk]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |100 x {{IL|Bottle of Morelways 1872|Appearance=}}
|10
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |10 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|30-66
|[[Procure a handful of more costly bottles]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |4 x {{IL|Bottle of Broken Giant 1844|Appearance=}}
|10
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |10 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|30+
|[[Plunder the wine-cellar]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |1 x {{IL|Cellar of Wine|Appearance=}}
|12.5
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |13 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|30+
|[[A gift for the guest of honour]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |1 x {{IL|Bottle of Fourth City Airag: Year of the Tortoise|Appearance=}}
|62.5
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |63 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|50+
|[[Something old, something new. Something borrowed, something blue.]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |{{TableList|1 x {{IL|London Street Sign|Appearance=}}|1 x {{IL|An Identity Uncovered!|Appearance=}}|1 x {{IL|Stolen Kiss|Appearance=}}|1 x {{IL|Aeolian Scream|Appearance=}}}}
|10
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |10 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|60+
|[[You will wear surface-silk!]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |100 x {{IL|Surface-Silk Scrap|Appearance=}}
|10
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |10 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|60+
|[[You'll look splendid in whisper-satin]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |20 x {{IL|Whisper-Satin Scrap|Appearance=}}
|10
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |10 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|60+
|[[You'll wear bombazine or nothing!]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |4 x {{IL|Thirsty Bombazine Scrap|Appearance=}}
|10
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |10 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|60+
|[[Incorporate puzzle-damask into your wedding attire]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |1 x {{IL|Puzzle-Damask Scrap|Appearance=}}
|12.5
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |13 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|60+
|[[Wear Parabola-linen]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |1 x {{IL|Parabola-Linen Scrap|Appearance=}}
|62.5
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |63 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|70+
|[[Get proper authorisation for the celebrations]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |1 x {{IL|Legal Document|Appearance=}}
|12.5
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |63 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|80+
|[[Ensure the guests behave]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |1 x {{IL|Blackmail Material|Appearance=}}
|12.5
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |13 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|100+
|[[Remember why you're doing this]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |50 x {{IL|Romantic Notion|Appearance=}}
|5
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |5 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|100+
|[[Procure something exceptional for the toast]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |1 x {{IL|Vial of Tears of the Bazaar|Appearance=}}
|312.5
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |313 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|100+
|[[Provide a particular piece of fabric for the veil]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |1 x {{IL|Scrap of Ivory Organza|Appearance=}}
|312.5
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |313 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|150+
|[[Ensure your venue is available when you want it]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |1 x {{IL|Comprehensive Bribe|Appearance=}}
|12.5 <ref name=hard>Harder to acquire than the value suggests</ref>
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |63 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}
|-
|200+
|[[The last hurrah]]
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |1 x {{IL|Night on the Town|Appearance=}}
|2.5<ref name=hard>Harder to acquire than the value suggests</ref>
| style="min-width:max-content; text-align:right;" |{{TableList|13 x {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance=}}|1 x {{IL|Lucky Weasel|Appearance=}}}}
|}
<references/>

If you wish to share the burden of organising with your soon-to-be spouse, then [[Foist the Organisation of your Wedding onto your partner]] will transfer over all your {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance = OaW}} and allow them to build it up further with the options in [[Plan a Wedding]].

====Analysis====
Which options are best for grinding {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance = OaW}} will obviously depend on how easily you can obtain the items they require, or whether you have significant stockpiles you're willing to use up for this. That said, there are a few standout options worth considering: most options cost about 1{{e}} per point of {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance = OaW}}, but [[Locate a reliable vicar]] and [[Source food from local street-vendors]] are substantially cheaper (about 0.48{{e}} and 0.5{{e}} per point, respectively. As {{IL|Rat on a String|Appearance = Rats on Strings}} are much easier to obtain than {{IL|Favours: The Church}}, [[Source food from local street-vendors]] will often be a good option, especially in the beginning.

[[Ratness Grinding (Guide)]] lists a number of grinds for {{IL|Rat on a String|Appearance = Rats on Strings}}; if you use the Unfinished Business option of [[Keep your hands quick]], you'll average about 1.81 {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance = OaW}} per action.

For rather exquisite weddings, an alternative is sourcing {{IL|Legal Document}}s from [[Hunting Bees in Old Newgate (Guide)]]. If this is done at 1 document over 6 actions, this reaches 9 {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance = OaW}} per action. If you're really going all-out, it may be worth grinding them via [[Barristering at Evenlode (Guide)]]; assuming you win every case at maximum prestige and cover the 16-{{IL|Dubious Testimony}} deficit per case with [[Enter the house (White)]], this can reach 11.25 {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance = OaW}} per action - although for smaller weddings the time investment of completing a Parabolan campaign may make this less worthwhile than hunting bees.

===The Venue===
Once you feel you have enough {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance = OaW}}, you can move onto the ceremony itself. Depending on your levels of {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance = OaW}}, you can choose from a variety of different venues. Note that each venue will set your (and your spouse's) {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance = OaW}} to a particular value, which will determine what you can do after the ceremony.

{| class="article-table" style="width: 700px;" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="1" border="0"
|-
! scope="col" |Venue
! scope="col" |Requires
! scope="col" |Sets to
! scope="col" |Other
|-
|[[Elope]]
|5
|0
|Costs {{TableList|{{IL|Notability|x 1}}|{{IL|Romantic Notion|x 20}}|{{IL|Secluded Address|x 1}}|{{IL|Stolen Kiss|x 1}}}}
|-
|[[A hurried riverside ceremony]]
|5
|10
|Costs {{TableList|{{IL|Notability|x 1}}|{{IL|Piece of Rostygold|x 50}}|{{IL|Shard of Glim|x 50}}|{{IL|Zee-Ztory|x 4}}}}
|-
|[[A hasty wedding|A tiny, shadowed room]]
|5
|10
|Costs {{TableList|{{IL|Notability|x 1}}|{{IL|Inkling of Identity|x 5}}|{{IL|Touching Love Story|x 1}}|{{IL|Phosphorescent Scarab|x 4}}}}
|-
|[[A proper working-class wedding|A crooked church and the Medusa's Head]]
|100
|10
|
|-
|[[A rooftop wedding!|The Flit]]
|200
|100
|
|-
|[[A celebration beneath the false-stars|A marquee in Winewound Heath]]
|300
|150
|
|-
|[[A wedding on stage!|The stage of Mahogany Hall]]
|400
|200
|
|-
|[[A zee-wedding!|On a ship at zee]]
|500
|250
|Gives {{IL|Notability|x 1}}
|-
|[[A bohemian celebration!|The streets of Veilgarden]]
|750
|375
|Gives {{IL|Notability|x 1}}
|-
|[[A grand event!|St Dunstan's]]
|1000
|500
|Gives {{IL|Notability|x 1}}
|-
|[[The event of the year!|St Fiacre's]]
|10000
|1000
|Gives {{IL|Notability|x 2}}
|-
|[[The talk of London!|The Bazaar]]
|10000
|1000
|Gives {{IL|Notability|x 2}}
|}

After choosing the venue, you are immediately redirected to [[The Ceremony]], where you [[Don the Ring]]. Congratulations! Now all that's left is the reception.

===The Guests===
At this point, you may spend your {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance = OaW}} to encounter various guests for various benefits.

{| class="article-table" style="width: 700px;" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="1" border="0"
|-
! scope="col" |Guest
! scope="col" |Costs
! scope="col" |Benefit
|-
|[[The letter]]
|600
|{{TableList|{{IL|Hard-Earned Lesson|x 1}}|{{IL|A Letter from the Empress|x 1}}|{{IL|Making Waves|+10CP}}}}
wipes {{IL|Scandal}}
|-
|[[A cowled and pontificant figure|Mr Pages]]
|100
|{{TableList|{{IL|Making Waves|+8CP}}|{{IL|Confident Smile|x 1}}}}
|-
|[[A cowled celebrant|Mr Wines]]
|100
|{{TableList|{{IL|Making Waves|+8CP}}|{{IL|Sudden Insight|x 1}}|{{IL|Wounds|-5CP}}}}
|-
|[[A cowled and silent figure|Mr Iron]]
|100
|{{TableList|{{IL|Making Waves|+8CP}}|{{IL|Hastily Scrawled Warning Note|x 1}}|{{IL|Suspicion|-5CP}}}}
|-
|[[The Tiger Keeper (wedding guest)|The Tiger Keeper]]
|50
|{{TableList|{{IL|Making Waves|+6CP}}|{{IL|Confident Smile|x 1}}}}
|-
|[[The Bishop is challenging all comers to a wrestling match|The Bishop of Southwark]]
|50
|{{TableList|{{IL|Making Waves|+6CP}}|{{IL|Sudden Insight|x 1}}|{{IL|Suspicion|-2CP}}}}
|-
|[[A plain black hansom cab, unremarkable in every way|The Gracious Widow]]
|50
|{{TableList|{{IL|Making Waves|+6CP}}|{{IL|Hard-Earned Lesson|x 1}}}}
|-
|[[The Jovial Contrarian is confounding your wedding guests|The Jovial Contrarian]]
|50
|{{TableList|{{IL|Making Waves|+6CP}}|{{IL|Confident Smile|x 1}}}}
|-
|[[Mrs Plenty is considering the quality of your reception wine|Mrs Plenty]]
|25
|{{IL|Making Waves|+6CP}}
|-
|[[A pair of devils]]<ref>Requires no {{IL|Your very own Infernal Contract}}</ref>
|25
|{{TableList|{{IL|Sudden Insight|x 1}}|{{IL|Making Waves|+4CP}}|{{IL|Favours: Hell|x 1}}}}
|-
|[[The Amanuensis]]
|25
|{{TableList|{{IL|Scandal|-3CP}}|{{IL|Making Waves|+5CP}}}}
|-
|[[A former lover: The Artists' Model]]<ref> Requires {{IL|An Admirer of Beauty -}} Beautiful Company and no {{IL|A Bitter Parting: the Artist's Model}}</ref>
|25
|{{TableList|{{IL|Confident Smile|x 1}}|{{IL|Making Waves|+4CP}}}}
|-
|[[An acrimonious former lover: the Artist's Model]]<ref> Requires {{IL|An Admirer of Beauty -}} Beautiful Company and {{IL|A Bitter Parting: the Artist's Model}}</ref>
|25
|{{TableList|{{IL|Hard-Earned Lesson|x 1}}|{{IL|Making Waves|+4CP}}}}
|-
|[[A former lover: The Jewel Thief]]<ref> Requires no {{IL|A Bitter Parting: the Master Jewel Thief}}</ref>
|25
|{{TableList|{{IL|Confident Smile|x 1}}|{{IL|Making Waves|+4CP}}}}
|-
|[[An acrimonious former lover: the Jewel Thief]]<ref> Requires {{IL|A Bitter Parting: the Master Jewel Thief}}</ref>
|25
|{{TableList|{{IL|Hard-Earned Lesson|x 1}}|{{IL|Making Waves|+4CP}}}}
|-
|[[The Melancholy Curate and his Enigmatic Sister]]
|10
|{{TableList|{{IL|Hard-Earned Lesson|x 1}}|{{IL|Making Waves|+2CP}}}}
|-
|[[The Repentant Forger 3|The Repentant Forger]]<ref> Requires {{IL|Acquaintance: the Repentant Forger}}</ref>
|10
|{{TableList|{{IL|Confident Smile|x 1}}|{{IL|Making Waves|+2CP}}}}
|-
|[[The Sardonic Music-Hall Singer]]<ref> Requires {{IL|Acquaintance: the Sardonic Music-Hall Singer}} </ref>
|10
|{{TableList|{{IL|Sudden Insight|x 1}}|{{IL|Making Waves|+2CP}}}}
|-
|[[A gaggle of urchins]]
|5
|{{TableList|{{IL|Favours: Urchins|x 1}}|{{IL|Hastily Scrawled Warning Note|x 1}}}}
|-
|[[A group of zailors]]
|5
|{{TableList|{{IL|Favours: The Docks|x 1}}|{{IL|Sudden Insight|x 1}}}}
|-
|[[A cluster of socialites]]
|5
|{{TableList|{{IL|Favours: Society|x 1}}|{{IL|Confident Smile|x 1}}}}
|-
|[[A giggling coterie of Bohemians]]
|5
|{{TableList|{{IL|Favours: Bohemians|x 1}}|{{IL|Confident Smile|x 1}}}}
|-
|[[A Rubbery man is putting amber in the punch]]
|5
|{{TableList|{{IL|Favours: Rubbery Men|x 1}}|{{IL|Sudden Insight|x 1}}}}
|-
|[[You search for an acquaintance (humble)]]<ref> Requires a venue [[Images of a Wedding:|that requires less organising than Winewound Heath]]</ref>
|1
|Sends {{IL|An Invitation to a Humble Wedding}} to an acquaintance of your choice
|-
|[[You search for an acquaintance (extravagant)]]<ref> Requires a venue [[Images of a Wedding:|that requires at least as much organising as Winewound Heath]]</ref>
|5
|Sends {{IL|An Invitation to an Extravagant Wedding}} to an acquaintance of your choice
|}
<references />

{{IL|An Invitation to a Humble Wedding}} lets the recipient gain {{IL|Bottle of Greyfields 1879|50 x}}; no reward; or a {{IL|Free Evening}}. {{IL|An Invitation to an Extravagant Wedding}} lets the recipient gain {{IL|Bottle of Greyfields 1868 First Sporing|1 x}}; {{IL|Scrap of Incendiary Gossip|1 x}}; or a {{IL|Free Evening}}.

Once you have 5 or less {{IL|Organising a Wedding|Appearance = OaW}} left, [[The celebration ends|an option]] to bring the celebration to a close (and thus leave the storylet) will appear.

===Seeking Divorce===
If you no longer wish to be married to your player spouse, you have two options; either a [[Seek a mutually-agreed divorce]], in which case your [[Sign the papers and begin the dissolution of your marriage|spouse's]] [[Sign, but only after the solicitor has read the documents to you|consent]] will begin the divorce process, or hiring a lawyer - [[Solicit an Ambitious Barrister|the Ambitious Barrister]] if you aren't yet a Tier 2 PoSI, or [[Solicit Baseborn & Fowlingpiece to finalise the matter|Baseborn & Fowlingpiece]] if you are.

Although the latter route will immediately dissolve your marriage, the former will instead give both players {{IL|Pursuing a divorce}} 5. This unlocks a storylet ([[Pursuing a Mutually-Agreed Divorce]]) in {{IL|Your Lodgings}}, which has various options to increase {{IL|Pursuing a divorce}}. Once both parties have {{IL|Pursuing a divorce}} 100, you may both play [[End your marriage]] to end the marriage. Alternatively, at any point before one party leaves the marriage, either may [[reconsider the divorce]], removing their {{IL|Pursuing a divorce}}.

Note that ending the marriage, by either route, will result in both players [[News has Reached the Royal Court|losing]] their {{IL|A Letter from the Empress}}, if they have one.

==Marrying an NPC==
Marrying an NPC is a great deal simpler. To marry an NPC, you need to have the relevant companion, and play the option in the relevant storylet in [[Your Social Engagements]] - for instance, to marry a [[Platonic Partner in Crime]], you must have a {{IL|Fabulous Accomplice}} and play [[Make your commitment to each other permanent]] in [[Cement your Relationship]].

Several NPCs require a storyline before you can marry them.
*For the {{IL|Celebrated Artist's Model}} you must first complete the [[Courting the Celebrated Artist's Model]] storyline.
*For the {{IL|Master Jewel Thief}} you must first complete the [[Courting the Master Jewel Thief]] storyline.
*For the {{IL|Philosophically Perfect Partnership}} you must first complete the [[A Philosophical Courtship]] storyline.

If you are a PoSI, you may also marry [[A Bewildering Procession of Companions, Lovers, Suitors, and Paramours]] with [[Formalise your Relationship]]; this costs {{IL|Cellar of Wine|x 1}}.

Divorcing an NPC is also much simpler, merely requiring that you play the relevant storylet in your lodgings - for instance, [[Separate from your Platonic Partner in Crime]] to divorce a {{IL|Platonic Partner in Crime}}.

[[:Category:Spouse|A list of spouses can be found here.]]
[[Category: Guides]]
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−	{{GuideFor\|Category=Category: Organising a Wedding\|Pages = Attend to Matters of the Heart!~~}}{{Audience\|EarlyPoSI~~}}	+	{{GuideFor\|Category=Category: Organising a Wedding\|Pages = Attend to Matters of the Heart!}}
	'' 'On the occasion of your marriage the Empress offers her sincere congratulations, and the following advice: Be sensible. Except when sense would admit defeat. Be kind. Except when kindness would come between you. Be faithful. Always. May your marriage bring you the happiness mine brought me. Eternally, Victoria R.' ''		'' 'On the occasion of your marriage the Empress offers her sincere congratulations, and the following advice: Be sensible. Except when sense would admit defeat. Be kind. Except when kindness would come between you. Be faithful. Always. May your marriage bring you the happiness mine brought me. Eternally, Victoria R.' ''